


I Am Not a Victim

by Narimiri



Category: Original Work
Genre: Anal Sex, Blackmail, Characters Compared to Different Animals Based on How They Act, Emotional Manipulation, Football | Soccer, Japanese Shame Culture, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Porn With Plot, Praise Kink, Public Sex, Spit As Lube, Teacher-Student Relationship, Unsafe Sex, Wet Dream, Wet Nightmare?? Is that a thing??, creepy teacher, very graphic sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-05-17 02:40:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14823671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narimiri/pseuds/Narimiri
Summary: Fukuoka Shun's life is perfect. He has a family who cares about him, a great school life, and his soccer team is aiming to win nationals.Too bad there's a "wolf" with his eye on him, who wants to take him, break him, and make him his....





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! Listen, little explanation of my vanishing act as of late, and Bound In's shitty update schedule.  
> I get story specific writer's block. Sometimes I just can't decide where I want a story to go. I wish it wasn't like that, but gosh damn does making Bound In not sound like a shit horror film take work.  
> Anyways, explanation time. This story came about from me brainstorming dark BL plots. I have a few other original work plot ideas up my sleeve with a similar idea to the idea this one is going to evolve into, including one about an idol and his manager. Let me know if a pairing like that interests you at all.  
> Warning: The following fic is unbetaed, so I apologize for awkward writing and bad grammar.

_ My name is Fukuoka Shun. I'm the captain of the soccer club, the school's idol. _ __  
__  
__  
_ My family was never cruel to me, I have lots of friends, and many admirers at school. I have a life many would envy and say has no faults. It is pretty much perfect though, so being jealous is okay. _ __  
__  
__  
_ My life is heaven.... _   
  
  
"Good job today, everyone! Fukuoka-kun, I have to speak to you about the first tournament of the season, could you please stay behind till I can speak to you?" Yamaji Ryotaro, I.A. Academy's gym coach, and the teacher assisting the soccer club. Kind and supportive to his students, and especially to the boys in soccer club.    
  
  
"Of course, Yamaji-sensei-- Ah, Katsuya-san, Sakagami-kun, wait for me at the gate, please!" Shun calls, waving to the two in question-- Sakagami Yūsuke, a tall, slender boy with glasses and inky hair, and Katsuya Juuzou, a bright eyed boy who seems to thrive on energy drinks and nothing else. Waiting around for Yamaji-sensei, Shun slinks into the locker room to peel away his sweat-soaked practice uniform. The locker room door opens after he's been in there about two minutes. Judging by the lack of student chatter outside, everyone has gone home, and Yamaji-sensei is making sure nobody left their things behind. Dead silent, Shun takes small footsteps towards the showers, hoping his teacher will think nobody's there.   
  
  
"Ah, Fukuoka-kun left his things...." The musing, husky voice of his teacher bounces off the tiled walls, and Shun can easily imagine him cleaning away the fog left behind from the showers on his glasses to read the nametag on the gym bag.   
  
  
Shun troubles his lip with his teeth as his teacher enters the showers from the opposite side to his current position, checking for left behind objects or messes made. Yamaji-sensei practically has a heart attack upon seeing him. "G-goodness, Fukuoka-kun, you frightened me," His teacher laughs, dark eyes darting left then right.   
  
  
"I'm sorry, sir," Shun keeps a level tone.  _ If you're so uncomfortable, why don't you leave? _   
  
  
His attention is drawn to a  _ look _ in his teacher's eyes. They seem to glint in a new way. "You know, Fukuoka-kun, as the captain of the team, you ought to become.... Closer, to the teacher advising your club. I'm sure our performance in tournaments would increase greatly, were you to improve your relationship with me even a little. If you just come a little closer, I'll explain."   
  
  
Dubious, Shun steps forward, his lean body wet still with sweat and completely exposed. That look in his teacher's eyes becomes predatory, like a wolf, and his dark blue athletic jacket is unzipped in a heartbeat. The only thing Shun can do in this uncomfortable situation is break face and laugh. He can't be serious, he's only being this way to play a joke on me....   
  
  
It proves to be no semblance of a joke, but Shun still tries to laugh, even as his hands are held behind his back, and he's unable to get away. "Y-Yamaji-se-sensei?! What's....? What are you doing?? Let me go-- Mmh!" Lips pressed against his own in a rush of what must be mature passion, Shun finds his body unwilling to try and get away.   
  
  
Yamaji-sensei takes him, pressed against his body, strong chest felt through his jacket, and sits on a shower bench, hand guiding Shun into a position of spread-legged submission, one that lets him see how much of a fool he looks if he just glances down, a task made difficult by the passionate kiss he's not allowed to break from as his teacher roams his body with intrusive hands touching everywhere they shouldn't.    
  
  
"My my," His teacher laughs, "You're so sensitive, Fukuoka-kun. I haven't even touched you here or here," He guestures to Shun's nipples, then to his half-hard cock, "And you're already moaning for me...."    
  
  
"N-no, I- l-let me go-- Ahh...! Haahh...!!" Shun begs, writhing in that firm grip as two fingers are forced into his mouth. He continues to protest and fight it once he can talk again, though his shouts of "Get off of me!" are cut off by a shrieking moan as one saliva-lubricated finger penetrates his hole.   
  
  
What are you doing, stop it, let me go! It hurts like hell! "Shh... I know it hurts now, but doing this will loosen up your body so you can play better. You're too stiff right now, Fukuoka-kun...." His teacher coos, working a second finger into his tight entrance.    
  
  
"Mmh... Ahhh....!! Y-Yamaji-sensei, l-let go of me...!" Shun whimpers, writhing with his head laying back on his teacher's shoulder. Yamaji-sensei's free hand starts to work his nipples, pinching them and tugging at the flesh.   
  
  
"Don't be so loud. This kind of extra training is to be kept a secret, Fukuoka-kun," His teacher orders as he slides his fingers out of his stretched hole. There's a sound of unzipping, and Shun is very aware of his teachers cock pressing against his hole.   
  
  
"Y-you fucking jerk, d-d-don't you dare-- Aaah! Ohh, ohh...!!" His eyes widen in alarm, and he tries to arch away from the pain of that  _ thing _ entering him. I'm going to split in half, fuck, fuck, it hurts! Yamaji-sensei begins to thrust up into him, hands pinching and twisting his nipples.    
  
  
"Look at yourself, Fukuoka-kun~ Your body is accepting my lesson beautifully.... At this rate, you'll be the best player in the tournament...." His teacher purrs. He glances down at his body, knowing he can't fight away Yamaji-sensei. His legs are spread wide, pushing the limits of his flexibility, and his cock is on full display, red and leaking precum. His arms are forced behind his back, and there's no way for him to get away.   
  
  
"A..ahh...! Se...sensei..." He moans, dizzy with... with pleasure as his teacher picks up the pace without warning, pounding against a spot within him that sends sparks up his body, leaving him stuck in pleasurable agony. He pulls and whimpers, heat building at the base of his cock and exploding out in gooey bursts of semen all over his body.   
  
  
"Ahh, your insides are so soft, Fukuoka-kun.... You're sucking me in so well~..." His teacher purrs. Yamaji-sensei's cool is lost for the moment as he curses in a dark, husky voice, his seed filling him up. "Such a good boy.... You live up to your name~" He presses a kiss to Shun's flushed cheek as he slides the boy off his cock.   
  
  
Eyes wide, Shun tries to stumble away, frantically grabbing his gym bag and digging his uniform out of it. I have to leave.... Before that happens again.... Why would he... He ducks around a corner, out of the shower room, and leans against a wall of gym lockers. He glances down at his body. A wet mix of cum, sweat, and a little blood trails down his thighs, which he wipes away as best he can, before pulling on his uniform. As he goes to leave, a pair of arms, those of someone wearing a blue tracksuit, wrap around him from behind.   
  
  
Yamaji-sensei's voice purrs,    
  
  
"See you tomorrow, Fukuoka-kun~ Don't tell anybody our secret...."   
  
  
Shun pulls away in a hurry, face still red. This fucking.... why would he....? He breathes a heavy sigh to calm his racing heart, and heads towards the school gate.    
  
  
"Fukuoka-san~!" Someone yells. Katsuya-san is waving to him from the gate. The boy is still in his practice uniform. Sakagami-kun stands beside him, dressed in his normal uniform, since he'd hurt his leg during practice, and got to sit out the last quarter of the practice session.   
  
  
Shun waves to them, putting on his social face and pretending nothing happened. They can't know. It's too strange of a thing to tell people I don't even call by their first names.    
  
  
_ Meeting with Katsuya-san and Sakagami-kun, we went out to an arcade together. I was barely able to keep my normal face up.  _ __  
__  
__  
_ I can't believe my own teacher would do something like... that to me....  _ __  
__  
__  
_ And the way he looked when he did it.... He looked violent and predatory, like a wolf.... My kind teacher looked sadistic.... I never could've imagined that.... _   
  
  
"I'll see you two tomorrow at practice! Bye!" Shun waves to Katsuya-san and Sakagami-kun, before going on his way, heading towards the train station. As he boards the train he needs to, he feels sort of like prey being stalked, watched. It's nothing. Definitely nothing.    
  
  
He stands in the direct middle of the train car anyhow. No chikan with any brains would go after someone in the middle of the train. He shuts his eyes as the train shudders into movement, going off down the tracks. His thoughts begin to drift back to the locker room, to that obscene position he was held in, and he feels a heat engulf his cheeks.    
  
  
The train jolting snaps him back to the real world, and his glance flickers hesitantly down to his lower body. Thank God.... He's not so ruined already that he'd become aroused by.... He shudders.    
  
  
He tries to tune out as the train rattles on, only returning to reality at the message telling passengers what station they've reached, and only fully listening when it's his stop. He looks around as he gets off of the train, and continues to scan the area with paranoid eyes and mind as he leaves the station.   
  
  
The walk home from there is short, and at home, he's quieter than normal, but gently brushes it off as being tired to his family.    
  
  
He excuses himself to his room early in the evening, forcing himself to sleep.   
  
  
_ "Fukuoka-kun, you came to see me~? Such a good boy, knowing exactly what you need~" The purr of Yamaji-sensei's voice sends chills up his spine.  _ __  
__  
__  
_ Not in control of his own body, Shun finds himself unable to speak, unable to blatantly give this man the opposite of consent. Those dark eyes glitter, and faster than he should've been able to move, were this not a dream-- it's only a dream, I'll wake up soon--, he's pushed up against the wall, moaning with too much sensitivity in his voice. _ __  
__  
__  
_ Intrusive hands feel over his body, hurriedly undressing him to grope at the tender, sensitive body underneath, husky voice murmuring that he's such a good boy. _ __  
__  
__  
_ With no prep, that painfully thick length that made him ache in the real world is thrust up into him, getting an agonized shriek out of him, which he tries pitiably to muffle with his hands as he's penetrated roughly.  _ __  
__  
__  
_ Something drips down his thighs. It's blood, sticky, crimson life. He moans till his voice goes hoarse, barely a feeble rasp now, a voice that can no longer deny consent. He's held tight by those slender, strong arms and pounded into until the pain becomes dull. _ __  
__  
__  
_ Just as it's starting to go away, an agonizing heat rips through him, raising him to an orgasm that tears through the veil of sleep. _   
  
  
Shun sits bolt upright in bed, scrabbling at his sheets and fucking  __ whimpering . The digital clock on the desk reads 05:13. He looks down at his shaky palms, sees the sticky patch on his shorts indicating that the dream affected him too much, sees the way his shirt clings to his body, wet with sweat that's gone cold from the A.C. running.    
  
  
He looks down at all these things, and promises himself he won't become a "victim".


	2. Secret

_ My name is Fukuoka Shun.... I thought... I thought I had a good thing going. I have good friends, and a great family.... _ __   
__   
__   
_ But I've also.... _ __   
__   
__   
_ I-I can't say. Please forget anything I said.... _ __   
  
  
"Fukuoka-kun, is something wrong? You seem gloomy," A voice and a hand on his shoulder come behind him, and Shun jumps, shoulders tensing against the "friendly" hand.   
  
  
"N-no, not at all, Yamaji-sensei. I just had a bad night's sleep...." Shun pulls away from the hand on his shoulder.  _ Fucking creep. You know exactly what the problem is. _   
  
  
"I see. You know, if anything is troubling you, you can always speak to me, Fukuoka-kun. My office is always open to anyone, particularly the academy's brightest."   
  
  
_ You disgusting fuck. _ "I'm fine, honest, sir," Shun mutters, shoulders raised defensively, repelling his teacher's contact and getting back to practice like nothing happened.    
  
  
Practice goes well as always, but leaves Shun and his teammates absolutely exhausted, and him in a hurry to get back home, being the first one to the locker room, and the only one avoiding the showers like they'd give him the plague.   
  
  
His hurry is his downfall today though, as he's stopped by his teacher, who orders in a threatening whisper that he go and wait in his office, wolfish smile pulling the man's lips at the way he runs like his life depends on it, all previous fatigue left behind at the soccer field.   
  
  
He waits outside Yamaji-sensei's office, whole body stiff with fear and only stiffening more at the approaching figure of the devil himself.   
  
  
Before yesterday, he would've never pictured hell coming in the form of a soccer coach in a blue tracksuit.   
  
  
"Fukuoka-kun, come in," Yamaji-sensei's voice is too kind as he ushers him in, seating him rather forcibly in a chair in front of his cluttered desk, hand lingering on his shoulder.   
  
  
"Just so you know, I brought you here to talk. That's all, nothing inappropriate."   
  
  
"T-talk about what?" Shun manages to ask in a mumbling squeak.   
  
  
"Our secret, and what will happen if you slip up and make others aware of... us," Yamaji-sensei begins, "For starters, Fukuoka-kun, you can kiss your spot on the I.A. Academy team a sweet goodbye if you attempt to tell anyone. You wouldn't want to fail your friends like that, would you?"   
  
  
Shun grips the arm of his chair hard, dark eyes going wide with fear. He wasn't planning on telling anyways, since any number of things could be ruined by doing so. His reputation, his pride, he could end up forcing them to withdraw from tournaments if they don't have a coach.....   
  
  
_ For everyone on the team, I'll... endure. _   
  
  
"I...I promise that I won't make our "practices" known, Yamaji-sensei...." Shun says passively.   
  
  
"Very good. Now, run on home, Fukuoka-kun~"   
  
  
That order is taken very literally, as Shun  _ runs _ out of school.   
  
  
The next few days are innocuous enough, with nothing received from Yamaji-sensei aside from hands lingering very often for far too long on parts of his body.   
  
  
Until...  _ That damn day. _   
  
  
From the minute he woke in a cold sweat from a filthy nightmare that morning, he knew it'd be a day planned by the devil himself, designed by the universe to leave him sobbing in bed by seven at night.   
  
  
But despite the sinking void of misery and anxiety, he makes it through the first half of the day.   
  
  
He wishes that void would swallow him up when he's "invited" to his teacher's office during lunch, an invitation he knows he's absolutely not allowed to refuse, or he'll face worse punishment after school.   
  
  
And so, he skitters off to Yamaji-sensei's office like a frightened animal, lunch left behind in the school's courtyard and baffled students watching him, Fukuoka fucking Shun, turn tail and run when ordered to a faculty office, like he really did do something wrong.    
  
  
He didn't....   
  
  
He arrives, hands sweaty and shaking as he opens the door and stumbles into the office.   
  
  
"Fukuoka-kun. I see you understand what would happen to you if you were to... not listen to the message I had that classmate of yours deliver."    
  
  
Slicked back hair selling the "creep who thinks he's hot shit" look, blue tracksuit the same as always, Yamaji-sensei doesn't even bother standing, and just calmly gestures to Shun to come close, to allow himself to be touched, no doubt.   
  
  
When he doesn't comply, Yamaji-sensei, voice having become a snarl, mutters, "I don't have all day, but I have enough time to do exactly what I told you I would if you weren't compliant, Fukuoka-kun."   
  
  
Shun's heart jumps in his chest from fear, and, like a puppy to an abusive master, he goes running to Yamaji-sensei, for fear of what that man has the power to do.   
  
  
That was a situation where no answer would've gotten him out of suffering in some way, shape, or form.    
  
  
_ But at least this way... I'm the only one in pain, the only one affected. _   
  
  
That little attempt at self reassurance doesn't stop him from tensing and  _ wanting so badly _ to fight back when Yamaji-sensei works at the buttons on his shirt.   
  
  
Those hands playing at his body make him want to scream and pull away, but he instead becomes submissive putty under Yamaji-sensei's touches, helplessly gripping at anything for just the smallest amount of support, tears stinging his eyes as he knows he can't escape this....   
  
  
He's stuck with a punishment despite having done nothing. Whimpering like a kicked dog as he's exposed, absolutely vulnerable and  _ loathing it. _   
  
  
Yamaji's words dig at him worse than his touches, though.   
  
  
"You're crying? Fukuoka-kun, we've done this before, I'm sure it doesn't hurt. And I haven't even gone inside you yet, what could possibly be hurting you?" He  _ knows _ how much this hurts Shun, body and mind, he's doing it on purpose.   
  
  
_ I won't break, I won't become your pretty little fucking victim. _   
  
  
Despite those insistent claims made to himself, Shun passively allows his teacher's hands to roam his body, getting him hot and riled up, moaning despite himself, hopelessly arching up into the air, body overheating even though he's completely stripped at this point.   
  
  
Arms hook around his body, one hand forcing his mouth open, intrusive fingers on the other violating his mouth to lubricate themselves.   
  
  
Despite all this, Shun is silent, for his own sake, so he won't have to face humiliation for the filth he appears to be. So he won't be a victim, someone to be thought of as pitiful and as nothing more than what's been done to him.    
  
  
So he "endures", fighting back tears that he wants to never let fall as those fingers work between his lips, a disgustingly long strand of saliva following them away from his lips when they draw away. Dripping wet, those fingers are shoved between his legs, beginning with two today.   
  
  
It still hurts, and Shun's mouth opens in a silent shriek, the sound that should be there replaced by hysterical breaths, and a short whine somewhat akin to that of a kicked puppy crying out, as his hands clench into white-knuckled fists, nails creating tiny gashes in his palms that he'll never bother to clean.   
  
  
Those fingers create only silent screams, but that's just what Yamaji wants.   
  
  
"Good boy, you wouldn't want our secret getting out~ Then we couldn't do this anymore, and wouldn't that be sad?"  _ It would be a goddamn treat. _   
  
  
"Yehsssssiirr...." Is the pitiful, rasped reply Shun gives him, instead of his more vulgar thought, what he wishes he could say. He's met with  _ fucking laughter _ , and a third of Yamaji-sensei's fingers adds to his misery.   
  
  
_ I think I'm bleeding.... _   
  
  
His tears begin to fall when he feels the blood drip down from between his legs.   
  
  
_ This is bad.... This is so bad.... _   
  
  
He doesn't remember anything, but when his mind drifts back to this world, he's laying over Yamaji-sensei's desk,  _ things _ dripping down his thighs. He knows it's a mix of cum, both his and Yamaji-sensei's, and.... and blood.   
  
  
He wakes up in the nurse's office, thankfully clothed, but dizzy and miserable.   
  
  
He remembers his... injury, and feels faint.   
  
  
_ This isn't an injury I can treat. Fuck, what am I supposed to do...? This could get infected.... What if I die from this? _   
  
  
His slow fall into panic is interrupted by the nurse entering the room. He breathes a shaky sigh of relief, because it could've been Yamaji-sensei, but wasn't....   
  
  
"Goodness, Fukuoka-kun, you gave poor Yamaji-sensei quite the scare, fainting during your talk. You really should eat properly, I know your club and practices take up a lot of your time, but you should take better care of yourself," The nurse flashes him a concerned, almost motherly sort of smile.   
  
  
"I-I know, I'm sorry.... I was just so preoccupied talking to Yamaji-sensei that I forgot all about eating lunch," Shun laughs nervously as he stands from the bed, a burst of sudden pain shooting up through his hips, and getting a very slight murmured whimper out through his lips.   
  
  
Despite the pain, he manages to walk out of the nurse's office like his hips aren't just about screaming, like every muscle in his body doesn't wish it were dead. Despite his agony, he joins the fleet of his classmates migrating to class 3-1.  __ It's okay. I'll be fine.   
  
  
He knows he's lying to himself, and just hopes he can make it through practice today….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my fucking god it's 5 in the morning. The best time of night/day to post your weird writing. (Specifically, 5 am while watching any YouTube videos I can get my grubby sleep deprived mitts on). And I am so sorry Shun. I don't know why I do this to characters,


	3. Hopeful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It only took two months, but there's finally another chapter!! As usual, my "no beta readers were used" disclaimer applies, all mistakes are my own and are stupid.

_ I...I'm Fukuoka Shun... _ __   
__   
__   
_ A fucking sorry excuse for a friend, a student, a person.... _ __   
__   
__   
_ I don't deserve any of the good things I get... _ __   
__   
__   
_ Since I'm just a coward who can't even confess, can't even help himself or anyone else. _   
  
  
After that day... Shun curls up in his bed at the end of the day, buried under the covers and trembling like he's coming down with something, and just  _ weeps _ .   
  
  
He barely touched his dinner, and now he shuts out his phone vibrating with texts from his friends, most likely asking why he was so off all day, limping and stumbling through practice like he's never walked before.    
  
  
Everything fucking  _ hurts. _ Yamaji is ruining his life,  _ ruining it _ . He curls in on himself with a weak sniffle.   
  
  
_ Calm down, Shun. Calm down... someone's going to notice you if you keep being so pathetic and loud and miserable. Act normal and everything will get better. It'll be fine. Stay quiet about it. Act like nothing happened to you. _   
  
  
Shun picks his phone up from the nightstand. Texts from Katsuya-san and Sakagami-kun. A few from his other teammates too.... He assures them all that no, he's fine. Silly him, he needs to eat properly. He sighs as he finishes answering the texts, right as his phone vibrates with low, low battery warning. He just plugs in his phone, and lays back, eyes fluttering shut.    
  
  
He wakes up the next morning, panting and shuddering from a dream he'd rather not recount. He stares out his window silently from his bed until he doesn't feel so shaky and sick anymore, before stumbling from his bed, checking his phone and seeing a small handful of new messages. Nothing special, aside from...   
  
  
_ Oh no. _   
  
  
A recent text from an unknown number, greeting him with a "Good morning, Fukuoka-kun."   
  
  
_ Yamaji-sensei... No....  _ He reaches to block the number, before his heart sinks at the punishment that could bring. "Who is this?" He responds, with as much naivety as he can put into a text message.   
  
  
"You know exactly who. Don't play coy with me. You don't want a punishment...."   
  
  
"Or do you?"    
  
  
"You do, don't you?"   
  
  
"Fine then, I'll enjoy this, Fukuoka-kun."   
  
  
"See you in class."   
  
  
Shun shuts of his phone, shaking as he reads the texts.  _ I don't want to go to school. I don't. I can't.... I'm scared.... He's going to hurt me.... I'm so scared.... He's going to tear me up.... I'm going to bleed again.... _   
  
  
He runs to the bathroom, thankful he's the only one awake as he crumples to his knees in front of the toilet, expelling the contents of his stomach, which isn't much more than the faint remnants of dinner mixed with stomach acid.    
  
  
He groans weakly, washing out his mouth in the sink.   
  
  
He just... sits there for a while, before meeting his eyes in the mirror.   
  
  
He's  _ pale _ , brown-purple shadowed dark circles under his eyes, faint hickeys visible just around the neckline of his too big shirt. He sighs heavily, turning and trudging to the shower to clean off and wake up.   
  
  
He really just stands in the shower for near 20 minutes before getting out and getting ready for school.    
  
  
He tries to lie to himself everything is fine, eating breakfast, leaving the house, arriving at school, all of these tasks done with his usual friendly demeanor and a smile on his face.    
  
  
And for the most part, it works. He's nervous deep down, but manages to keep it buried...   
  
  
Until Yamaji-sensei's class.    
  
  
_ It'll be fine. _ He shakily enters the gym, sure his friends who're accompanying him notice his smile and laugh at grow more forced.   
  
  
"Fukuoka-san...? What's wrong...?" Sakagami asks, cleaning his glasses as he speaks.   
  
  
"No-nothing.... I'm fine," Shun smiles, tenses and weak, but a smile.    
  
  
Katsuya glances skeptically at him, following his gaze to where Yamaji-sensei stands, talking to a group of female students. "Are you scared of Yamaji-sensei??" He inquires.   
  
  
"Why would he be scared of...." Sakagami trails off, baffled.   
  
  
"I-I'm not. There's really nothing wrong, you two," Shun manages to force a more real seeming smile.   
  
  
"You're acting really... freaky, today," Katsuya remarks, repeatedly glancing between Shun and their teacher.    
  
  
Shun denies their assumptions, promises he's fine.   
  
  
It works, he's fine, doing great, able to uphold his act...   
  
  
Till practice.   
  
  
Practice puts him in far too close proximity to Yamaji-sensei, with the man taking every chance he can to linger with hands on his body and inconspicuous words said with a hint of  _ something _ .   
  
  
He doesn't know what that something is, but it's fucking with him on every conceivable level.   
  
  
He keeps thinking of Yamaji-sensei's morning threats of punishment, wonders why it wasn't carried out at lunch. What could this sick freak have planned?    
  
  
A dull, sudden pain sends him falling back, the impact when he hits the ground snapping him back to reality.    
  
  
"F-Fukuoka-senpai! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hit you!" Someone's voice meets his ears, that of an underclassman scurrying to pick up the ball and clasp his hands together in apology at the same time.   
  
  
Shun takes far too long to register that he was probably hit in the stomach with that ball, and that that's why he's currently on the ground.   
  
  
"O-oh, don't be, I should've been paying more attention~" He cracks a grin to ease his kouhai's panic.   
  
  
The boy sighs worriedly, apologizing again, and practice continues.    
  
  
Shun makes sure to act more natural from then on. Even though....   
  
  
Even though he's being watched, he can tell Yamaji-sensei is watching him, watching with that wolfish smile. Just the thought makes him play tense, play  _ weak _ .   
  
  
Practice ends, and he's been so focused on acting natural that he's forgotten his teacher's morning messages, blocked them from his head, blocked them right out. He's lied to himself, made himself forget. He's forgotten, and by the time he's walking into the locker room, he feels almost... happy. Almost normal.... He chats with Katsuya and Sakagami casually, actually laughing. Laughing for the first time in  _ days _ . His shoulders go slack with loose, casual conversation as he talks,  _ smiles _ . He pulls off his practice jersey, happily chats about their upcoming first game of the season.    
  
  
Yamaji-sensei is nowhere to be seen, and so he can laugh, he can be happily, wonderfully...  _ normal _ .    
  
  
The poor first year, Asahi Aoba-kun, who panicked when he hit him with the ball comes up to him again. "F-Fukuoka-se-senpai! I'm so s-so sorry for earlier, I didn't m-mean to hit you!"   
  
  
Shun cracks a massive grin at his kouhai, patting him on the shoulder. The scrawny boy squeaks, and only grows more flustered at Shun's loud and cheery, "Don't worry about it, Asahi-kun~!"   
  
  
He's ignoring the day's previous stress, chatting in the comfort of friends in the locker room. He laughs at their jokes, loud and clear. "Guys, how 'bout once we get done here, we all meet up for karaoke or the arcade? On me~!"   
  
  
His teammates clap, two of them, a tall, strong boy named Igarashi, and a slender fellow third year named Nagakura, even cheering at the idea. He laughs hard, and cheers back, sending a wave of cheers through the group of boys.   
  
  
"Alright~! Let's all meet up downtown together, we don't have to all head down at the same time~ Just as long as we all get there, we can head off whatever ways we choose~" Shun beams, "I'll get there, I just might be late, so don't go payin'!"    
  
  
"Captainly duties, right??" Katsuya punches him in the arm with a laugh, getting a soft "oof!" out of him.   
  
  
"That's right, Katsuya-kun~" He switches honorifics, he's feeling friendly, so is the rest of the team, it's all okay~   
  
  
"Oooh, what's next, are we gonna be on a first name basis~?" Katsuya teases.   
  
  
"Maybe so~ Depends on if you can stop teasing me about it," He playfully ruffles his shorter, more hyper teammate's hair.    
  
  
The team continues to chat and banter even as some of the group heads to the showers. They all dissipate, heading out early to chat with other friends while they wait on Shun.   
  
  
Shun is  _ so damn happy _ , he feels  _ normal _ . He finishes up his shower, dresses in his uniform, and pauses. He pauses to look at himself, reflected distorted in the tile floor of the grimy locker room.   
  
  
He smiles, running a hand through his already messy, wet hair. He feels dizzyingly confident, lips quirked in a cocky smile. He feels so fucking great, uplifted as hell.   
  
  
Then...   
  
  
His phone vibrates. He fumbles for it, and his heart sinks when he sees the unread message.   
  
  
"I'm waiting in my office, Fukuoka-kun."   
  
  
He  _ whimpers _ . His reflection's cocky smile melts away, brows furrowing and mouth forming a tiny "o" of worry. Panic sets in, he feels worse than he did this morning. The floor sways beneath him, his stomach churns.    
  
  
A soft groan leaves his lips, a groan not of pleasure but of "God, don't make me do this....". He squeezes his eyes shut tight, rubs his temples, sighs, and musters up the courage to take steps forward.   
  
  
He shakily walks out of the locker room, applying his false smile like his female classmates apply lipstick. He clenches his fists, walks with his head held high. He's full of false confidence, but his lie to himself has crumbled, he knows he's going to be hurting when he meets his friends.   
  
  
But he smiles as he walks into the school, down the hall, up the stairs, walks to a door that reads "Yamaji Ryoutaro".   
  
  
He knocks, swallows the lump in his throat, and thinks...   
  
  
__ Into the belly of the beast.... I hope I make it out....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the tone shift near the middle seems strange, I meant to use it to prove Shun is lying to everyone to the point where he can even make himself happy, and to take him away from Yamaji to give him a moment of relief.

**Author's Note:**

> Note: Yamaji saying "You live up to your name" is a reference to the kanji used to spell Shun (the spelling I use when writing his name in kanji is "俊" which means talented). He's basically saying that Shun is naturally talented at being fucked.


End file.
